“While sex is a major player in the movie, responsible not only for its most famous scene but also for the main plot arc, it seems like a secondary thought. The film focuses on everything that comes before and after a trip to the bedroom.” —Michael Errigo
Neither Harry nor Sally is a very popular name anymore, so the chance of a Harry falling in love with a Sally or a Sally falling in love with a Harry is unlikely nowadays from a statistical view alone. When director Rob Reiner teamed up with writer Nora Ephron in 1989 to create When Harry Met Sally…, —arguably the greatest romantic comedy of all time— those names were a bit more common.
To truly appreciate the film that will turn 25 this summer, it’s necessary to watch it twice. I first saw it late one summer night at the beach a couple of years ago. Like many people, I had heard the name before, because of the movie’s popularity and its uniquely simple title. I watched and enjoyed it. But it wasn’t until the second viewing that I loved it. All re-visitings feel like seeing an old friend again and becoming reacquainted with familiar subtleties and quirks.
Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan’s chemistry and ability to give a dose of humanity to a delightfully witty script make this movie more than just hilarious. Crystal, amused by the oddities of others and the depths of his own depression, is the perfect mix of sensitive and confident. Sally is maddening in her stubborn romanticism and adorable in her naivete. Both are relatable in their flaws; each theory or idiosyncrasy of theirs reminds me of someone I know.
While sex is a major player in the movie, responsible not only for its most famous scene but also for the main plot arc, it seems like a secondary thought. The film focuses on everything that comes before and after a trip to the bedroom. What the movie is truly about, from the interviews of different couples dispersed throughout up to the last New Year’s scene, is companionship.
That word seems old now, a relic left over from a time of different ideologies. In today’s world of relationships, it’s buried under other words such as “hookup” and “Tinder.” The idea of searching for someone you love to spend time with no matter the activity, who makes you scoff at societal lines drawn between friendship and attraction, is laughable. Much like those sci-fi films produced before CGI, lacking in modern technology and out of touch with today’s realities, When Harry met Sally… is dated.
In the course of my research for this piece, I went to IMDb and typed “When” into the search bar. The first movie that came up was the 2010 Kristen Bell movie When in Rome. Unfortunately, I’ve seen the film — a sad fact that can be blamed on my younger sister. To put it frankly, the movie is an absolute mess, a misguided rom-com with nothing to say. But it’s representative of the modern romantic comedy, so bad the genre has become a punch line of sorts.
But what is a movie if not a reflection of society? The issue isn’t that Hollywood can’t capture the intricacies of modern courtship and romance, it’s that they don’t exist. When this film was made, the only unrealistic aspect was the ending monologue in which Harry pours his heart out. But now it’s all like that. The late-night talks about nothing, the decade-long friendship without a trace of sex, the lifelong companionship. It’s all Hollywood scripting, simply fiction.
Harrys and Sallys don’t fall in love anymore.
