Taylor Swift

High hopes fell hard in the past week of the NCAA tournament. Out of the millions of brackets registered on ESPN, just one survived the Round of 64 this year.

And after Ohio State fell to Arizona, there were none.

Of course, I’m not one to talk, as my bracket broke right when Northern Iowa beat Wyoming. If you want a leg up, Forbes found ways to increase your chances of picking a perfect bracket from 1 in 9.2 quintillion to 1 in 128 billion … oh … thanks.

For some context on those numbers, you have a better chance of getting struck by lightning, killed by a shark or going to the hospital because of a “pogo stick-related injury” than picking a perfect bracket.

Full disclosure: The author of this article had Butler winning it all, though, and they fell to Notre Dame, so take all that as you will.

However, I am writing all of this as I watch Michigan State beat Virginia — no problem, I only had UVA going to the Final Four. I now know how that Villanova piccolo player feels.

But I digress. This year was my first time filling out a bracket, and I decided to go in blind, as it seems no amount of research can predict the upsets. While I picked teams I thought would do well, I probably would’ve been better off choosing teams whose names I liked.

These people appear to have as good a chance as any, because let’s face it, there’s no rhyme or reason to who wins or loses, at least to this young basketball aficionado. As I struggled to comprehend why my predictions quickly crumbled, I tried to relate the tournament to something I better understand. Taylor Swift.

Here are the eight stages of watching your bracket go down in flames, as told by T-Swift.

1. You start out with so much hope; sure you’ve selected all the real winners.

2. The first loss hits hard, but you try to hold it together. There are a lot of games left.

3. It’s gonna be OK, really.

4. Turns out you picked the underdog for the upset, and they won. So there’s that.

5. The team you knew for sure was going to do well … isn’t. (Looking at you, UVA.)

6. You see someone in your bracket group is still in the 90th percentile, somehow.

7. When you watch Melo Trimble sit on the sidelines as Maryland falls to West Virginia, you have to find a way to vent your frustration.

8. But in the end, you know you never stood a chance, and all that’s left is to cut the losses and enjoy some basketball.