After last year’s snoozer of a Super Bowl, this year’s big game turned up the intensity in every possible way: Ballghazi. Interceptions. Dancing sharks. It is definitely a game that will be remembered for years to come.
And, of course, let’s not forget the commercials.
Even if you weren’t invested in the duel between the reigning Super Bowl champs from the west and the alleged cheaters from the east, this year’s ads were the best in years. Ranging from the tender to the hilarious, this year’s batch of ads got the Internet buzzing. Though several ads thrived off the use of dads, girl power, people with prosthetic limbs and screaming goats, some ads decided to venture off the beaten path and into new territory.
This territory, however, is very bizarre. Here are some of the most awful and awkward advertisements of this year’s Super Bowl.
Chevy
Chevy
What’s the best way to flaunt your manliness? According to the early spot by Chevy, it’s a giant truck. The commercial shows a focus group of attractive women looking at two identical photos of a man and agreeing that the hotter photo is the one where he is standing with a pickup truck.
The selling point of this commercial couldn’t been more shallow. “Are you compensating for something? Do people think you are gullible? Buy a Chevy pickup truck and women might possibly one day look at you, you insecure lady-man.”
The sad thing is that you can argue that this was actually Chevy’s better spot, given the fact the other one tricked viewers into thinking their cable failed as a way to advertise the wi-fi that is now available in their vehicles.
In all, not a good year for Chevy.
Esurance
Esurance
Esurance’s Super Bowl spots tried to address the problems of insurance companies making assumptions about their customers based on demographics with their “sorta” ads. The first one, which appeared early in the first quarter, was a bit baffling. A young boy emerges from school to find Lindsay Lohan waiting in a car to pick him up in lieu of his mother, who matched Lohan’s demographic profile.
It only “sorta” made sense, but Bryan Cranston appeared as a “sorta” pharmacist in the company’s second spot, which made the company’s message clearer.
Ok, maybe not, but at the very least, it delighted many Breaking Bad fans.
Skittles
Skittles
Skittles has been running unusual commercials for a while using the “verb the rainbow, taste the rainbow” formula, but the imagery in this one set the bar high for disturbing Super Bowl commercials to come.
When two yokels eating Skittles discover that they have reached the last yellow Skittle in the bowl, they agree to settle their disagreement in the “usual way.” In this town, the “usual way” is apparently arm-wrestling, and everyone, from elderly ladies to young kids, has a bulging right arm, finely trained to handle things “the usual way.” Skittles can use the word “usual” all it wants, but this commercial is still not fun to look at.
Squarespace
Squarespace
This ad was simple, but in this simplicity it achieved a level of weirdness that few other ads could match.
The commercial for Squarspace, a website builder and hosting site, was just a shot of Jeff Bridges playing a bowl and humming. As the camera panned out, it revealed that next to Bridges’s chair, a woman was asleep in bed. The ad urged you to visit dreamingwithjeff.com, a website of Bridges’s “sleeping tapes.”
That is not a rabbit hole I will leap down. You win this round, Squarespace.
McDonald’s
McDonald’s
Taking a cue from tearjerker ads like Always’ “Like A Girl” spot, McDonald decided to try to spice up their Super Bowl commercial with a little pathos. Having said that, the “Pay With Lovin’” spot isn’t exactly bad, but the concept behind it is unquestionably strange. It’s hard to deny how heartwarming it is to see people in a fast food establishment exchanging words of affection in exchange for their greasy meals, but…well, people were pouring out their hearts in a McDonald’s. For free food. They went to the counter and were told to show affection instead of paying $6 and some change for a Big Mac meal. While the examples shown were touching, how many customers were told to call their mom only to tell the beaming cashiers that mommy dearest was no longer of this world?
If that’s not awkward enough, according to the ad, the “Pay With Lovin’” promotion will be continuing in McDonald’s restaurants until Valentine’s Day, so you, too, can have a chance to open up your heart for an 8-pack of McNuggets.
Hey, at least McDonald’s is determined. If their food can’t get to your heart, at least their ads might.
Nationwide
Nationwide
From the start, Nationwide’s spot, featuring a young curly-haired boy, looked like it was going to be nothing more than a forgettable CGI mess. The ending of the spot, however, decided to subvert the viewers’ expectations in the worst possible way. After the little boy takes the audience through adorably precious visions of him flying and attending his own wedding, it is revealed that the little boy died of a preventable household accident.
The commercial then shows a number of potential situations that could have murdered our little dreamer, such as drowning in a bathtub, swallowing cleaning products, or being crushed to death under a fallen plasma screen. A little girl is shown being carried by her mother, casting her eyes on you as if to say, “you monster.”
But at least the commercial reminds you that even if your little darling is offed by some tragic disaster, Nationwide is on your side.
Budweiser
Budweiser
Though it was rumored it would not be returning this year, the Budweiser Clydesdale commercial was a Pixar movie in miniature, stealing hearts with its darling depiction of the friendship between a puppy and a herd of horses. However, the beer giant’s second offering was far more aggressive. Taking on the growing prevalence of microbrews, this ad boasts that Budweiser is a “proud macrobrew.” This is beer for beer people who like to drink beer that is harder to brew than those fancy flavored ales you love so much, so maybe you should reconsider your priorities, you non-dedicated beer drinker.
If you are one of those people who enjoys a nice IPA, Budweiser lets you know exactly what the company thinks of you: you are a handlebar mustache-wearing beer snob, and you are not fun at parties.
Coca-Cola
Coke
Coke got a lot of undeserved flack last year for their “America the Beautiful” commercial, so this year, they seemed to go for the McDonald’s route and pick a feel-good but ultimately bizarre theme for their ad. It seemed to address cyberbullying, but at the same time it failed to acknowledge the dangers it presented: spilling soda in a server room isn’t going to spread joy and love and togetherness via the Internet. It’s going to destroy your servers. Get it together, Coke.
GrubHub
GrubHub
I’m sure many students at this university are familiar with online food-ordering service GrubHub and were delighted with the company’s sweet deal for customers who used the site during the Super Bowl. However, though in theory their ad would get across their super service and variety of options, the one message seemed to really carry was that Chipotle is waiting to bash your skull in. Burritos can fly, and boy, are they are after your noggin.
I don’t know if I will be using GrubHub anytime soon, but I’ll remember to wear a helmet if I do, so to reduce the likelihood of tortilla-based injuries.
Loctite
Loctite
Fannypacks? Check. Big Steve Urkel glasses? Check. Terrible dancing? Naturally. Superglue company Loctite’s ad was middle school dance-levels of weird and awkward, but they knew what they were doing. Videos that tacky and awful are instant viral video magic, and Loctite’s Super Bowl spot was calculated to get them in on that kind of attention.
