“Unfortunately, the reality of Domino’s Specialty Chicken is disappointing both for folks with taste buds and for lovers of spectacle. It’s The Human Centipede II to KFC’s Double Down.” – Warren Zhang
Oftentimes, a fast-food chain will introduce a horrifying new product that instantly captures the nauseated imagination of America.
The KFC Double Down achieved infamy as a product seemingly ripped straight out of the pages of Paula Deen’s next cookbook. It’s The Human Centipede of fast food — a product whose premise is easily explained and so grotesque that it was almost guaranteed 15 minutes of fame.
On the other hand, something like Taco Bell’s Doritos Locos Tacos became a runaway success because of how beautifully the abomination married two similar and equally trashy faux-Mexican foods into a heinous love child.
For a while, Domino’s Specialty Chicken looked like it could pull off both feats — a pizza made out of fried chicken is a shameful, shameful idea, but there’s an undeniable poetic justice to a sub-par pizza joint marrying its cardboard-tasting concoctions with similarly wooden fried chicken.
Unfortunately, the reality of Domino’s Specialty Chicken is disappointing both for folks with taste buds and for lovers of spectacle. It’s The Human Centipede II to KFC’s Double Down.
You see, Specialty Chicken, despite its somewhat deceptive photography, isn’t actually a pizza. Domino’s, to its credit, has been fast to point this out, but it’s still immensely disappointing that Domino’s didn’t actually give birth to the pizza on top of fried chicken.
Instead, Specialty Chicken consists of greasy yet tasteless chunks of chicken topped with suspiciously colored and textured white goo — “cheese,” according to the unhelpful Domino’s website.
I ordered the Crispy Bacon and Tomato Specialty Chicken because it looked the most pizza-like out of all the options, but the actual product didn’t remotely resemble a pizza.
High expectations for fast food is a folly, I know, but Domino’s Specialty Chicken couldn’t even meet my already rock-bottom expectations. These sad, cheese-covered chicken nuggets represent failure on so many levels that it’s appalling anyone could ever serve something this oily, this salty and this dry.
Every bite felt like I was eating gritty sand doused in melted lard. Nothing about this dish is appealing — not the concept, not the appearance, not the taste, not the texture, not even the smell.
Domino’s Specialty Chicken is one of the worst things I have ever put in my mouth, including KFC’s Double Down. This latest creation should have never existed — a novelty without novelty, food that is outright inedible.
