About three years ago, I walked into my first college dorm room — 2108 Wicomico Hall. Coming from a working-class background, I was giddy at the notion of having several pieces of furniture to myself. I marveled at the functional electrical outlets and free Internet connection.
The desk was my favorite. I found great utility in the bookshelf-like wooden piece on top, which I later learned was called a “hutch.”
After three days or so, the romance had ended, and I was over it.
Wicomico Hall is one of the most disgusting, unsafe and obsolete residence halls on the campus. The doubles are small and barely equipped to house two human beings uncomfortably, let alone comfortably. The rooms have unsightly pipes sticking out of the walls at odd angles. There is no air-conditioning, and for some reason, the rooms resist air circulation, so you’d be lucky to wake up covered in sweat — rather than drenched or drowning in it — when it’s hot out.
In the winter, the radiators either don’t work, forcing you to stay curled up in the mornings for fear of hypothermia, or work overtime, forcing you to swim off the top bunk in a pool of salty sweat.
The residence hall itself has a few air conditioners in communal spaces, one microwave and a small laundry room.
Meanwhile, students lucky enough to land assignments in Dorchester Hall benefit from a multi-purpose room, air conditioning, a computer lab, a kitchen and a laundry room. They are also situated in a prime location next to Stamp Student Union, Tawes Hall and McKeldin Mall.
Despite Dorchester’s stellar amenities, the Department of Resident Life classifies both this building and Wicomico as “traditional halls.” This means residents in doubles and singles pay the same basic housing rate in both buildings.
To say this is wrong would be a travesty of characterization. This is tragic.
In any other real estate venture, you get what you pay for. When it comes to housing at this university, you pay for what you get.
To be fair, Resident Life does adjust the prices to some degree. Students living in triples and quads get a 15 percent discount off the basic housing rate. Students who live in apartment-style units pay a little extra.
But this allowance is so small it’s practically invalid. Simple logic dictates the following: No air conditioning? Discount. No laundry room? Discount. No computer lab? Discount. In the middle of nowhere? Discount.
Not only that, students should be allowed to pick where they live. What if an incoming freshman desperately wants to live on the campus to get the full collegiate experience but is strapped for cash? They would surely suck it up, sacrifice the amenities and live in a dorm like Wicomico or Caroline Hall.
What is the logic behind charging people the same amount to live in terrible buildings?
Are we paying to develop memories, romantic relationships, a sense of camaraderie and long-lasting friendships?
Sorry friends, but I would’ve made different friends in Dorchester, and I would’ve been cozy doing it.
Fix it, Resident Life.
Michael Casiano is a senior English and American studies major. He can be reached at casiano@umdbk.com.
