After weeks of yearning for the return of good television, I finally fell to the guilty pleasures of bad television. But before you think scrambled images and hairy palms, the corny jokes and predictable plot (not that I don’t love it) of a show like Full House was all the bad TV I was looking for. Unfortunately, my hopes of gaining some wholesome family values quickly died as I came across a man, a clock and lots of bling.
As I watched Flavor Flav make his third attempt at finding his true love, I couldn’t help but wonder how exactly this public enemy became so loved; I mean, he’s no Danny Tanner. Still, I watched as Flavor Flav forgot the name of one girl after another and even watched as Thing 1 won a challenge by eating brains (Dr. Seuss would be proud). Needless to say, I felt myself getting stupider. Of course, the show’s ratings are through the roof. So, am I really the only person who can’t stand anymore love?
That’s when I realized the show’s appeal. Even though I couldn’t bare another scene, I couldn’t turn away either. The drama and sheer idiocy of an 80-pound man with a clock around his neck make the show grossly entertaining. Apparently we go to “reality” television to laugh at the staged drama in the lives of the fabulous. OK, understandable.
What’s questionable is why exactly we need this drama thrown at us from every aspect of the media. Very recently, I turned to CNN for a world news update, crossed my fingers for real stories, and was predictably disappointed. My lingering craving for some global issues was thwarted by a top story whose appeal to pathos was so overwhelming it was pathetic.
The story, titled “From $70K to food bank, one family’s struggle,” described Patricia Guerroro (an average American) and, well, exactly what the name implies: her loss of her $70,000 salary and the struggles her family is experiencing. As the story attempts to address the issue of the U.S.’s diminishing economy, it fails to do so by incorporating only Guerroro’s heartache and difficulty. Although the story is heartbreaking, really, it falls short of real news by lacking in hard facts.
After looking at one source of news after another, I became queasy. Apparently, our local and even national news networks prey on the idea of manipulation. As they turn another Britney Spears-related incident into breaking news, they expect us to fall to our knees before the television, mesmerized by what can only be described as gossip. To put it simply, in the eyes of the anchors, we’re attracted to celebrity drama like toddlers are to glitter: “Oh, shiny!”
After too many disappointments, I did, astonishingly, find one satisfying report. Too bad it was British. I did not once hear of any breaking news, even though most of the stories struck me as significant, even life-altering. From what I’ve seen through recent experience, breaking news on the BBC is as rare as its inclusion of celebrity gossip. As CNN.com chooses to classify news as either “U.S.” or “World,” BBC.com has a category for each continent, the Americas included. The top story on the website, “Baghdad under curfew amid clashes,” was based on straight facts and had no reference to any British person involved. The story was strictly global news. The varying opinions and quotes within the article, including those from President Bush and Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri Maliki, led me to assume objectivity, a rare aspect in most news corporations.
Soon after, I ran into a friend who commented on my newly discovered appreciation for British news. “BBC? That channel’s boring,” she said. I felt validated. If she thought it was boring, it was probably because there was no glitter.
Of course, I’m not going to be so small-minded as to quickly assume that all British news is good and all American news is bad. But the fact that the primary goals of American media and the BBC differ greatly is undeniable. As American corporations focus on profit, monopoly and power, they look to weak stories that harvest attention, roughly similar to a magazine such as Star. The BBC, however, continues to recognize the historic values of free press, values that epitomize public good and, in turn, generate stories that prove significant and worthy of attention.
The idea that the dos and don’ts of celebrity fashion even exist in our world updates is upsetting and simply ridiculous. Is it too idealistic to believe that one day, our minds won’t revolve around the fabulous lives of unworthy egomaniacs?
Gina Sagar is a freshman fire protection engineering major. She can be reached at gsagar@umd.edu.
