When it comes to building a home, most of us are aware that there needs to be a firm foundation to keep the structure standing. Without this pillar of strength, the smallest storm could blow your house down and destroy what you have worked so hard to create.
If we know a house will fall without a strong foundation, why do keep pretending that our relationships won’t crumble as well?
We all know that the best homes are built on concrete and brick, yet here we are continually forming our relationships on sand and straw. Whether or not we are aware of our construction blunders, we are continually building dream homes on top of sinkholes, not digging deep enough before fabricating our fantasies. Why are we so quick to jump into engineering our dreams before actually developing our relationships?
As I peer into my past, I find myself stuck on the times that I tried to build a house of love and ended up building a house of cards. Every time my house fell I sat there blaming the cards at my feet instead of looking at the foundation of my flimsy design.
After my last love home crumbled, I decided to re-evaluate the building process.
As I analyzed my blueprints for a relationship, I realized that my problem was more than just a bad foundation; I was building my relationships on top of rocky ground, a place where even the best relationship had no hope for survival.
When it comes to the realm of relationships, we often forget that we have to build ourselves up before we can even foresee formulating a plan for the future. The reality is that we have to be strong and sturdy alone before anything else can be built on top of us.
As someone who used to be afraid of being the only person on her block without a house on her lot, I can tell you that being alone gave me time to clear the debris that my past relationships had left. As I cleared the weeds from the garden of my heart and threw away the sticks and stones that had broken more than my bones, I finally saw myself clearly again.
After many trials and tribulations, I learned that when you decide to build your dream home, there has to be a sturdy foundation of self-love before you can pour the concrete mix of trust, honesty and laughter into the framework of your relationship. It is then, and only then, that you can know for sure that your relationship, like your home, will stand the tests of time.
