Junior English major
Bossy. Aggressive. Stubborn. Pushy.
These words all are used to describe girls and women who are more assertive than others. However, words such as leader, trailblazer and confident are used to describe boys and men who are more assertive.
Unfortunately, I am no stranger to being called adjectives associated with assertive women. When I was little, my preschool teachers told my parents they referred to me as “little boss girl” because I always spoke up when I was not a fan of something. Whether it was because I didn’t like the snack that day or because I told Davy he was hogging the tire swing, I always asserted myself one way or another. Unfortunately, my teachers construed my assertions as bossy behavior.
Now I don’t know what my teachers told Davy’s parents when he decided he would be the line leader for the day or when he insisted on passing out the juice boxes, but I bet they did not call him bossy. I bet our teachers called him a natural leader, someone who took the reins without hesitation, whereas I was called bossy, someone inclined to dominate or be dictatorial over a group of 5-year-olds.
Thankfully, my “bossiness” did not stop me from possessing self-confidence and achieving leadership goals throughout my life. However, being branded with adjectives like bossy, aggressive and stubborn can prevent young girls from being positive, assertive leaders; young girls become ashamed of being called these names and stop asserting themselves in school, extracurriculars and even their home lives.
No one, not even my parents, batted an eye when I was called a little bossy girl back in the late ’90s. In fact, my parents still call me bossy to this day, which I’m not too fond of.
Now, a little less than 20 years later, society is finally starting to notice the repercussions of the word bossy. Thanks to a campaign called Ban Bossy, started by the Girl Scouts and Lean In, telling society to stop demarcating young girls with adjectives like bossy. The campaign does an excellent job explaining how the word affects young girls, how parents can encourage their daughters to rise above the word’s use and how the term is almost never applied to boys.
Everyone, especially educators and parents, needs to join Ban Bossy’s campaign and educate the rest of society how just one word can paralyze an assertive, young girl from turning into a leader. Most importantly, women and girls of any age, from 6 to 60, need to rise above “bossy” and appreciate their assertive natures and leadership qualities.
Granted, girls and boys alike can be guilty of overasserting themselves on the playground or in the classroom. For example, on a few occasions I had to be held down in timeout because I refused to listen to my teachers’ directions. However, educators, parents and peers need to recognize calling girls and boys bossy diminishes their leadership skills and encourages them to retreat into a shell of defeat created by society. If we can successfully ban bossy, then we can help encourage both young girls and boys to be positive leaders.
Maggie Cassidy is a sophomore English major. She can be reached at mcassidydbk@gmail.com.
