Chamberlain/Russell.

Bird/Magic.

Vasquez/Selig?

I decided to challenge Terrapin guard Greivis Vasquez to a game of H-O-R-S-E just to settle one of those debates and find out who is the better basketball player.

Everyone told me I had no chance, but let’s look at this matchup a little closer.

Sure, Vasquez started for the Venezuelan national team this summer, but did he play on his town’s travel B-team in sixth grade like I did?

Sure, Vasquez had a near triple-double at Duke, but did he have a near triple-double total in a days’ worth of pick-up games at the ERC?

Sure, Vasquez played with Kevin Durant in high school, but did he play with his sub-six-foot buddies in his backyard like I did in high school?

It’s no contest. Just look at the credentials. There’s no way Greivis Vasquez could beat Mark Selig.

Who am I trying to kid? If I give him one letter I’ll be satisfied. He’s going to beat me like a Greg Paulus rag doll. This is like a No. 1 seed vs. a No. 16 seed. Except more lopsided.

We met at Comcast Center. Greivis walked in wearing an Air Jordan jumpsuit, but socks and sandals. With the choice in footwear, maybe he’s taking this 16-seed lightly.

He offers me the first go at it, so I resort to my bread-and-butter through-the-legs layup. Miss! That’s alright, maybe he’ll go easy on me.

Greivis takes his first shot and drills a one-handed three-pointer. OK, maybe he won’t go easy on me. The ultra-competitive guard hates to lose whether it’s in the NCAA tournament or in a gym against a newspaper columnist. I should have known.

I saunter over to the spot where Greivis took his first shot and ready myself for the imminent brick. Except, somehow, I hit it.

We’re still even.

After a couple misses between the two of us, Greivis converts a simple free-throw. I line up to take the shot with full confidence in my foul-shooting ability, before my adversary puts his hand on my back and whispers, “20,000 people in the stands screaming at you.”

With the false added pressure, I miss. Greivis’ taunt worked, just as it did when Scottie Pippen told Karl Malone that “the Mailman doesn’t deliver on Sundays,” during Game 1 of the 1997 NBA Finals.

Vasquez: NothingSelig: H

When we get back to my turn, I decide to take Greivis’ height advantage out of the equation by shooting from my knees. I make, and Greivis misses to tie the score at one letter apiece.

Vasquez: HSelig: H

When Greivis gets his shot back, he unloads one from a couple feet behind an NBA-range three-pointer. Swish! Once again, I figure it will be a sure miss for me, but my heave thuds off the backboard and in. “That’s a long shot, man,” he says to me. Sure, it wasn’t pretty, but it counts all the same.

A few missed shots ensue before I go back to my strategy of nullifying the size advantage. I sit Indian-style just in front of the free-throw line and chuck the ball up and in. Greivis complains about my tactics and proceeds to shoot and miss.

Vasquez: H-OSelig: H

With my first lead in hand, I quickly tack on to it. Standing under the basket, but facing away from the hoop, I toss up a backwards shot off the backboard and through the net. Greivis calmly attempts the shot but his try rattles off the rim and out.

Now he’s feeling the pressure. To prove he’s now getting serious, Greivis takes off his warm-up jacket, exposing his Montrose Christian High School T-shirt.

Vasquez: H-O-RSelig: H

Luckily for me, Greivis has missed a few three-pointers on his turns. I tell him, “You’re lucky Gary [Williams] isn’t here to watch this.”

Greivis pushes my taunts aside and nails a jump shot from the elbow. “Nice and easy for you,” he says.

Well, it wasn’t easy enough. My shot goes awry and gives me a second letter.

Vasquez: H-O-RSelig: H-O

Greivis had been trying a left-handed, through-the-legs shot all game, and this time he finally hits it. I attempt it, but the ball just fumbles out of my hands during the transition. We’re back to even.

Vasquez: H-O-RSelig: H-O-R

One more deep three-pointer from Greivis, and this time I can’t counter. Just like that, he comes back to take the lead.

Vasquez: H-O-RSelig: H-O-R-S

What would this classic battle be without a little controversy?

On my turn, I call a shot which entails throwing the ball off the shot clock and in the hoop. Miraculously, the ball does just that for me.

Greivis takes his stab at the trick shot, and his ball “appears” to hit the top of the backboard and go in. “No good,” I say. “It’s gotta hit the shot clock.”

“It did just nick the clock,” Greivis responds. “That counts.” After a short deliberation, I begrudgingly count the basket for him.

With momentum on his side, No. 21 knocks down a jump shot a couple feet behind the charity stripe. As I attempt to equalize it, Greivis lets out a primal scream. “Aaaah!” I miss the try to end both the game and my chances at a Cinderella upset.

Final Score

Vasquez: H-O-RSelig: H-O-R-S-E

After the conclusion of our game, Greivis jokingly asks me why I don’t join the team and tells me I’d have the second-best shot on it, following Eric Hayes, who can routinely beat anyone else at H-O-R-S-E.

In reality though, my near-upset was just an underdog having a good day, while the favorite wasn’t on his game, leading to a closer contest than anticipated. The 16-seed never beats the 1-seed, but sometimes they can give them a scare.

At least I can take solace in the fact that on this day, I gave Greivis Vasquez a scare.

mseligdbk@gmail.com