Photo courtesy of sunglasshome.com
On a scale from one to 10, how cool do you think you are? If your rating is anywhere below five, continue reading. Here are some quick tips on how to be cool. Thank me later.
Instagram selfies
Think of your photographed face as an uploaded gift from the gods. You must post a picture of your face four times a day — at a minimum. Get creative with it! Duck faces are certainly welcomed. The entire world will love you and not find you annoying at all.
Sunglasses
Contrary to what many may believe, sunglasses should be worn in all climates. What do you mean the sun isn’t out? So what if you are inside of a building? Sunglasses indicate you are cool, so don’t even bother taking them off. Trust me, no one really needs to see what your eyes look like anyway. Be mysterious. When is looking like the lead singer of Smash Mouth a bad thing? Case closed.
Talk about yourself
When meeting potential friends, talk about yourself excessively. They will be completely absorbed in the conversation. Random facts about yourself are almost as impressive as back handsprings. Your new friendships will blossom far beyond the confines of Facebook.
Quote Vince Vaughn
This must happen at least twice a day. Don’t be predictable either! I’m not talking Dodgeball or Wedding Crashers — I’m talking Fred Claus. It gets them every time.
Initiate a texting conversation but do not text back
You are not being rude by being unresponsive. You showed interest; now it’s time to back off and make them wonder. One text is surely enough effort toward any friendship. If they complain about it, that means it worked.
