Life would be so much more fun if we could all fly, using just a little faith, trust and pixie dust. If only happy memories could lead to such magic, like in the Disney classic Peter Pan. Does class make you happy? Work? Sex? Food? Well, just think about it, and I’ll meet you on cloud nine. At least, that’s how we thought it worked when we were young.
Unfortunately, because life doesn’t work that way, happy memories don’t really produce tangible results. If they did, we would have more reason to put so much stock in them. It should be OK to feel unpleasant emotions, so why do we shy away from them?
The answer is simple: Stress feels bad. Anger feels bad. Sadness feels bad.
Why would we want to acknowledge these upsetting emotions when the only result is a crushing feeling of how cruel it is that our souls are allowed to feel like this?
Peter Pan doesn’t account for what could happen if an unhappy thought infiltrates the mind while flying. Every few minutes, most people remember something that doesn’t add to the positive end of the happiness equation. Whether it’s an embarrassing memory, some piece of work to do later or a new bit of sad or angry information, it pops up relentlessly. Depending on the strength of the unhappy factor, it has the potential to pull you away from the ideal optimum happiness level.
But without unhappiness, how would we know that joy is a good thing? The Beatles said “happiness is a warm gun.” Is it still happiness, even though it may not make another person happy? Do we really determine what happiness is in our own minds, or does society do that for us? Ingrid Bergman said “happiness is good health and a bad memory.” Should we forget the things that make up our being, just because they taint our self-image?
People need to realize that true feeling is so much better than simple happiness. Human emotions fluctuate far too often to count on happiness to stick around for a while. If you accept that, and start fully feeling each different emotion, you can be a healthier person. Trying to be happy 24/7 can hurt you more than help; it forces you to stuff negative emotions down into the deepest depths of your consciousness. WebMD, the leading source for trustworthy and timely health and medical news and information, explains handling your bad feelings is much better than squashing them.
I know I’m no expert on these things. My observations and personal experiences are the only real evidence I can use to form my opinions. But so much can come from utilizing the University Health Center, which has trained professionals to help students balance their emotions and become healthier human beings. From Mental Health Services, to the Center for Health and Wellbeing and the Sexual Assault Response and Prevention Program, the health center accounts for almost any problem a student could face. There’s sleep education, diet analysis, relaxation training, confidential therapy and peer advocates. Stress can sometimes be as debilitating as an eating disorder. No trial of college life is too unimportant to be taken seriously.
Taking advantage of these resources is not weak; in fact, it makes you smarter than the students who neglect to use them and continue to live unhealthy, stress-ridden lives. According to Aristotle, “Happiness depends upon ourselves.” Take your life in your own hands. Make sure you stay both physically and emotionally healthy. This can truly lead to overall happiness – and can ensure you don’t die too soon. And as Oscar Wilde, one of my favorite writers, said, “Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” Leave cheerfulness in your wake. Don’t hide behind college tribulations; deal with your negative emotions, before it’s too late.
Maria Romas is a sophomore English and journalism major. She can be reached at romas@umdbk.com.
