Pitchfork’s flock of loyal followers
Ryan Schreiber is Pitchfork Media’s reigning fairy godfather turned CEO. When he waves his golden shepherd staff at his pasty, pimply flock of hipster sheep, they all, obligingly, follow him into whatever absurd terrain he has named to be their destination.
It takes a well-informed outsider to identify when and how we all succumbed to Pitchfork’s sneaky and brilliant form of high-concept brainwashing, and I can attest that I am not that person. But I can pinpoint definitive wisps of its recent self-righteousness that prove the following: We, as intelligent members of an ever-growing music-loving society, need to make a clean break. Here’s why…
With the new “People’s List,” in which Pitchfork tasked us with listing our favorite 200 albums from 1996 to 2011 so statistics regarding readership could be compiled, Schreiber and company are testing us in the most pretentious way possible. On the surface, it takes time and effort to compile such a list. Yet 27,981 voted. This is a definitive flag for unbridled dedication.
But you also don’t have to look far to see that every album in the top 20 scored above an 8.0 in Pitchfork’s own reviews. Plus, looking at the final list, there is a link to each album’s Pitchfork review as well as a direct voter quote that summarizes the review. It’s a calculated congratulations delivered by Pitchfork’s readers, something along the lines of a tyrant affirming his control over a body of confused people.
However, a case can be made for the legitimacy of Pitchfork’s recommendations, as most of the albums on this list are actually great pieces of music. In fact I reluctantly made my own list and found myself including many of the same records that wound up at the top of the final tally.
In the end, Pitchfork is a vital publication for what it does and without it we’d undoubtedly be less musically aware. But it’s also a bloated corporation that’s constantly getting bigger. It will remain a part of our lives until we decide to learn what’s out there on our own. Let’s start breaking the streak now.
essner@umdbk.com
