Growing up in the United States, we are repeatedly told money cannot buy happiness. Money may not, but we are constantly advised that there are other ways to guarantee happiness. To succeed, to be the best, to get the best grades, the top job, the most attractive spouse – all of these things we are told will bring us happiness if we work diligently to achieve them. Ambition is supreme among our virtues and the American dream reflects this. Anyone, regardless of social position or background, through hard work can make it to the top. Hard work, the American mantra, is commonly acknowledged as the key to success, acclaim and ultimately to our own self-worth.

It isn’t entirely uncommon for a brave soul to stand up and heretically claim that true and lasting happiness is not linked to our material success. Of those who have chosen a different path, the most famous of the American heretics was Henry David Thoreau. Thoreau wisely noted “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation,” suggesting our daily struggles are largely futile and only result in the debasing of our innate worth.

We have too many concerns, too much work to get done and never enough time to enjoy what little time we have left. In this process we have sacrificed our dearest possessions at the altar of our own success. Most who have read Thoreau agree with his message of simplicity, but few choose to take his advice to heart and follow the path that he laid forth. We tend to nod our heads in agreement and then return to our Sisyphean tasks that, like a ball and chain locked to our ankle, cannot be ignored.

Thoreau’s message must not be discarded so carelessly. Success does not bring happiness, only momentary feelings of satiety and completion that may be quickly lost. The dark side of success is that it brings the expectation of continued success. This expectation is an unnatural standard that threatens to link our perception of our own worth to the external validation of others. Only by continuing to succeed can we prove our success was not just a matter of chance or luck. This year’s victory leads to next year’s expectation of victory, something that no amount of labor or foresight can guarantee. While failure is more feared, success has an even greater potential to disrupt our dreams.

If this argument is a bit esoteric, consider the words of the Notorious B.I.G., one of the 20th century’s most gifted lyricists, who wisely noted “the more money we come across, the more problems we see.” As we acquire more possessions, receive acclaim and become more successful, our problems tend to increase in both magnitude and complexity. Thoreau’s prescription for this problem, to dispense with the nonessentials, was beautifully presented with one word: simplify.

If we are to find happiness we mustn’t look for it in our bank accounts, in our sexual conquests or in our athletic success. It isn’t something we find written under our name on our business cards or even in the admiration of our peers and friends. Even with our closest friends or loving family, if we don’t find worth within ourselves, our contentment will be fragile and short-lived. One lesson we all must learn over and over again is that nothing lasts forever. Friends, family, jobs, our youth, our talents and all that we hold dear are transitory. If happiness is to be anything but a fleeting dream it must have its foundation within ourselves.

Our relationship with ourselves is the only constant throughout our lives. Work hard, set lofty goals, follow your dreams, but distinguish between your dreams and the expectations others have for you. Carefully examine your day-to-day life and your long-term goals and endeavor to simplify your life by freeing yourself from the nonessentials.

Remember that our self-worth is innate and needn’t tremble with the trials of our daily lives. With a strong and stable self-concept we can weather the misfortunes of our worst failures and our greatest successes. Only through the combination of a strong and independent self-concept, hard work and the desire to continually challenge ourselves can we realize what we are ultimately capable of becoming. When our self-worth stems from our intrinsic worth and not from the expectations of others we will be unfazed by the external storms of time and chance and can achieve a true and lasting happiness.

David R. Foster is a doctoral student in criminology and criminal justice. He can be reached at Dfoster@crim.umd.edu.