ALIEN VS. PREDATOR – REQUIEM
Let’s be honest: It’s not like Alien vs. Predator – Requiem had a particularly high bar to clear. But even when compared with its idiotic 2004 predecessor, Alien vs. Predator, this film is a disappointment. Basically Halloween with the Aliens as Michael Myers and the Predator as Dr. Loomis, AVPR is too moronic even to enjoy as trashy entertainment.
Longtime visual effects specialists the Brothers Strause (who have previously worked on films such as 300 and Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer) somehow seem to make their actors worse. As a result, there is a uniformity to all the performances in AVPR, a sort of storm of bad soap opera-style acting and bad noir-style acting in which no one shines.
One of the few merits of AVPR is its liberal dispensation of murder – no one is safe from a violent death. While this treatment may veer off the sick end, particularly one bit with a pregnant woman, it does provide AVPR with some very low-brow fun, which you’ll be happy to encounter at all while wading through Shane Salerno’s (Shaft) embarrassment of a writing credit. When the Alien has the best dialogue, you know you’re in trouble.
But the Alien and Predator fight, right? Sure they do. However, the fight is choreographed with all the creativity and grace of a bar fight, which would probably be more fun to watch than this monstrosity. In fact, save your money and buy a sandwich; chances are it will be more entertaining.
– Staff writer Dan Benamor; dan.benamor@gmail.com
RATING: 1.5 STARS OUT OF 5
CLOVERFIELD
When audiences packed theaters this past July to take in Transformers, the most substantial reaction from many wasn’t triggered by Michael Bay’s shallow, special effects-laden blockbuster. Instead, the buzz came from a compelling preview: homemade footage of a party in New York interrupted by a tremor, an explosion and the Statue of Liberty’s head being hurled across the streets of Manhattan. The trailer didn’t even give a title – just a Jan. 18 release date.
Six months later, Cloverfield has finally arrived. With the hype generated by the mysterious trailer and an elaborate marketing campaign, the brainchild of producer J.J. Abrams (the mastermind behind Alias and Lost) has become one of the most anticipated films of the year.
Cloverfield’s premise is that a devastating attack on New York City was captured via a camcorder found in “the area formerly known as ‘Central Park.'” The footage shows that the omnipresent cameraman, Hud (T.J. Miller, Carpoolers), was recording testimonials at his best friend’s (Michael Stahl-David, The Black Donnellys) farewell party when he suddenly found himself in the middle of the fateful catastrophe.
The innovative idea from Abrams and director Matt Reeves, childhood friends who co-created Felicity, marks a triumphant revisit to the monster movie genre. The anonymous cast and realistic dialogue sell the documentary-style presentation, as does Hud’s character, who is portrayed as a bit na’ve in order to justify his unenviable role in the narrative.
Cloverfield’s suspenseful sequences, woven with the creature’s measured unveiling, captivate from beginning to end, while Drew Goddard’s (Lost) script even incorporates some believable characters. The origin of the terrifying monster is left shrouded in doubt, but there are cryptic hints that, like in any self-respecting Abrams work, can only be caught by the sharpest of eyes. Considering the enigmatic nature of Cloverfield, though, it couldn’t have been better any other way.
– Staff writer Thomas Floyd; tfloyd1@umd.edu
RATING: 4 STARS OUT OF 5
27 DRESSES
In case you were wondering, it’s official: Katherine Heigl (Knocked Up) is now a movie star. As the leading lady of the romantic comedy of the month, 27 Dresses, and of last year’s Knocked Up, Heigl has proven herself to be a chick-flick actress of substance.
A rare Julia Roberts or Meg Ryan type, capable of taking a merely average film to better-than-expected heights, Heigl has worked her magic with her latest film, centered on a girl who is always, always, always a bridesmaid.
Just like any romantic comedy, 27 Dresses begins with a ridiculous premise. Jane, a still-single twenty-something, has been a bridesmaid 27 times in her short life, with no hope of her own wedding any time soon. She is hopelessly and unrequitedly in love with her boss, and that doesn’t change when her little sister comes to town and sweeps him off his feet.
Meanwhile, James Marsden (X-Men: The Last Stand) plays Kevin, a cynic trying to win Jane’s naturally romantic heart. The only problem? Kevin is a reporter, and according to chick-flick history (How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Never Been Kissed) he must be writing a story about her. Shockingly, the cliché doesn’t disappoint: Kevin is trying to develop a story on Jane and her freakish bridesmaid history.
Although 27 Dresses’ plot is a little more than slightly ridiculous, Heigl holds the audience’s attention with her quirky facial humor and well-delivered one-liners, while Marsden is similarly witty and charming. And hey, he’s prettier to look at than Seth Rogen.
– Staff writer Courtney Pomeroy; courtney.pomeroy@yahoo.com
RATING: 3.5 STARS OUT OF 5
I AM LEGEND
Give some actors a whole screen to fill by themselves, and the results can be spectacular (see Tom Hanks, Cast Away). Will Smith is similarly impressive in I Am Legend, but it’s all for naught – the film just ain’t so hot.
In I Am Legend, Smith plays Robert Neville, the last human left in New York City in 2012 after a 2009 outbreak of the virus meant to cure cancer mutates and kills more than 90 percent of the world’s population. For three years, Neville and his dog Sam have traversed the ruined streets of Manhattan, hunting deer and gathering vegetables from a Times Square garden.
But Neville and Sam are always mindful of the setting sun, because the virus didn’t kill every human: It mutated some into creatures of the night. Sunlight burns the mutants, and they bear little resemblance to humans, other than sharing their basic shape. Unfortunately for I Am Legend, the use of CGI to create the humanoid creatures makes them feel artificial through the whole film. Ultimately, the characters aren’t believable, and they detract from what could have been a strong film.
The shots of New York City as a crumbling shell of its former vibrant self (Times Square overgrown with vines, for example) are awesome, so it’s a shame that the CGI used on the city wasn’t also used for the creatures. Without better effects, I Am Legend ends up as a cross between Cast Away and a garden-variety zombie movie. Smith’s acting talent is superbly displayed, both in the scenes with his family and when he is utterly alone, hiding in his apartment. It’s a shame the rest of the movie doesn’t match up.
– Staff writer Tripp Laino; tripp.laino@yahoo.com
RATING: 3 STARS OUT OF 5
SWEENEY TODD
On the surface, Sweeney Todd couldn’t have a better creative team: Director Tim Burton’s (Corpse Bride) tendency toward goth-gloom perfectly fits the grisly material; Johnny Depp (Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End) always digs his teeth into these weirdo roles; and scripter John Logan (The Aviator) is a capable veteran who knows how to structure the drama for maximum effect. The only problem? Burton’s decision to cast actors who aren’t vocally trained in all the key roles; without enjoyable music, Todd flounders.
The musical, about a murderous barber out for revenge in London, uses lyricist-composer Stephen Sondheim (the Broadway legend who did the original Todd); however, his music and lyrics are chatty to begin with, and Depp and the other actors only make the music talkier. Sometimes, it sounds like the actors are just talking in rhythm, a not-so-pleasant listening experience.
A musical without good music is close to being a comedy without laughs: It’s an impossible mountain to overcome. Had the film incarnation of Todd not been a musical, it probably would have been better. The acting is top-notch, with villain-playing veteran Alan Rickman as the horrible Judge Turpin, Helena Bonham Carter (Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix) as the screw-loose baker Mrs. Lovett and Depp in glorious psycho-mode as Todd. Burton revels in the dark settings and bleak subject matter. John Logan’s script is about as good as you could ask for.
But if only they could sing! Todd could have been a hell of a movie: dark, tragic and strange. Instead it’s dull, over-long and tiresome.
– Staff writer Dan Benamor; dan.benamor@gmail.com
RATING: 2 STARS OUT OF 5
THE ORPHANAGE
Let this be shouted from the mountaintops: Guillermo del Toro is a cinematic visionary. See: The Devil’s Backbone, Hellboy, Pan’s Labyrinth. Ignore: Blade II.
And, true, he didn’t direct The Orphanage, the latest scary Spanish-language film; he just produced it. Nevertheless, the film reeks of del Toro’s touch – adorable kids who flirt with a made-up world (or is it?), devoted mother figures and horribly creepy imagery – and, as a result, The Orphanage flourishes.
The film centers on a woman, Laura (Belén Rueda), who returns with her husband Carlos (Fernando Cayo) and son Simón (Roger Príncep) to the orphanage in which she grew up. Laura and Carlos plan to transform the orphanage into a home for sick children, but before they can even start taking care of one child, tragedy strikes: Simón disappears. Laura, wracked with grief, blames herself and becomes convinced that Simón’s imaginary friends – including a boy named Tomás (Óscar Casas), who Simón described as wearing a cloth mask terrifying in its simplicity – have kidnapped him and are keeping him in the house. Carlos, who doesn’t share Laura’s other-wordly belief, begins to withdraw from his wife as she grows more and more obsessed with tracking down Simón – and her own supernatural leanings. Plot twists, intriguing character development and lots of goosebump-worthiness ensue.
Unlike American horror (which gravitates toward the gore-gasms of films such as Hostel, Saw, etc.) the Spanish horror movement dwells more on the mental, and del Toro works with director Juan Antonio Bayona to set up as much suspense as possible. The film’s dark tone permeates, and a convincing performance from Rueda drives home a mother’s desperation for her lost son. And the ending? As unexpected – and satisfying – as you could imagine.
– Senior staff writer Roxana Hadadi;
roxanadbk@gmail.com
RATING: 3 STARS OUT OF 5
